Wednesday, August 12, 2009

To Hell or The Zoo?

I was such a good parent/babysitter and took all the girls to the zoo. We would have gone yesterday, but it was forcast to be 10 degrees cooler today. I was actually excited about this. We could get out of the house, which we don't do much, and go see somethings we don't normally see. Sounds like a good idea....


Turns out the zoo isn't even remotely worth the trouble.

We weren't in the gate before Itty Bit started complaining about the heat. I know she doesn't like it when it's hot. But they ALL wanted to go to the zoo. Surely she understood the zoo is outside?

As we stood in line for tickets I explained to them: We will all stay together and we will not be eating lunch here. (Zoo food sucks, to say nothing of the cost.) Fair enough right? They all agreed.

10 minutes later, they all start to complain about how hot it is. "Can we sit down in the shade? I am sweating." Blah, blah, blah. I am allergic to direct sunlight. I have on long pants and a long sleeve shirt. I point this out to them, and say I haven't even broken a sweat yet.

Somewhere along the way DQ appointed herself the field trip leader. She and Miss. Thang (the girl I watch) kept getting ahead of me and Itty Bit. I kept telling them to wait up. Then we would all stop to look at an animal, only to be told a moment later by DQ "OK, let's go." Several times I had to remind her that she is not the mother or the boss.

We stopped to buy a bottle of water, for 2.25 mind you, and all have a rest. The whining continues, and I say if everyone is so miserable, we could just go home. No No. Not 10 steps later, they want to sit down again. I'm like holy crap. I can't believe these kids.

We were about half way through the zoo when I let them go play in the water fountains. Our zoo has the tall shooting water spouts in a courtyard style area that the kids are encouraged to get wet in. Itty Bit doesn't like to get wet, but they other 2 were all for it.

Itty Bit and I were sitting on a bench on the outside of the courtyard, holding all the "stuff". DQ and Miss Thang come slinking over to us, and I ask "What?" DQ mumbles something about a baby being in the water so I say "So?" They both had this morified look on their faces. "What about the baby?" I ask. "We stepped on her." DQ says. I was in complete shock. And I am searching the area for a baby who might have been stepped on. Nothing! "Where is the baby?" I ask. DQ points to a woman with a baby wrapped in a towel standing by a stroller. "Oh My God, what did you two do?"

I snatch up Itty Bit and all our stuff and race over to the woman. "Excuse me, did one of my girls knock your baby over?" The woman looks up and sees DQ and says "If that's your kid in the black (She was wearing purple) then yeah, she plowed her right over." I am instantly appoligizing up and down. This lady is pissed. I would have been too. Well I was pissed, actually. This baby couldn't have been more than a year old. My 2 were busy running around like maniacs and smacked right into her. Poor thing.

That was it for me... I told the girls I'd had it and we were going home! To top it all off, the back seats in the car are soaked, because, of course, my crack heads didn't have time to dry before they got in.

But the animals were nice. They didn't mind the heat at all.


He gives new meaning to butt ugly monkey. His hind end was all shades of the rainbow.


Up close and personal with a giraffe. The girls seem less than impressed.


Some BIG striped deer type thing with long horns?


A teeny tiny fox.


Wrestling meerkats


Grumpy Children


The star of our zoo, the red panda. She is actually pretty big. Her mate is up in the tree behind her. They have escaped their enclosure twice.


  1. Oooh, those Grumpy Kids exhibits can be scary, I hope you didn't get too close!

  2. Zoos always seem to sound better before you go. Why is that?

    The only zoo trip I've really enjoyed was an afternoon the Son and I spent in the National Zoo in DC. it wasn't too hot and we had the afternoon to ourselves - neato was the verdict from him.

  3. we tried taking the little guy to the zoo once. it was a disaster. but he's probably a bit young for it still.

  4. Wow! Glad you made it through the ordeal.

  5. I was expecting all the kids to be under the age of 5! lol They sound just like my kids!

  6. I reckon the zoo smelled swell too!!

    I should hunt the deer like thing with long horns.

  7. Love the grumpy children pic! But they sound worse than some old people I know by complaining that much. You should've duct taped their whiny little mouths so you could have the opportunity to shine as the excellent tourguide you proved to be with your pictures :) Now we all know why I don't have children.


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