Thursday, August 6, 2009

Be Aware of this new ailment, Writers workshop

Writers workshop... That time of the week where I bow to Kat's feet for relieving me of the task: What to write about today? Get in on the fun, head on over to Mama's Losin' It and check it out.


This week we had interesting topics to choose from. One of which was: 2.) Share with us something you made by hand. That was just too easy for me, so I took a different prompt.

1.) What's ailing you? Diagnose yourself with a syndrome.

Today I would like to talk a little about a newly acknowledge illness, B.M.I. syndrome. This affliction has been around for a long time, but doctors and psychologist are finally getting around to admitting it exist. I suspect it took them so long, because these fields are mostly dominated by men, and B.M.I. syndrome mostly affects women.

I am personally an expert in this syndrome, because I suffer from it myself. I want to bring awareness to this issue, and let other women know they are not alone. If you suffer from these symptoms, it is likely that you also have B.M.I. syndrome.

Exhaustion and excessive sleepiness
Unexplained weight gain or loss due to forgetting to eat and then stuffing the first thing you find in your mouth.
Forgetfulness. As in repeating to yourself, over and over, what you need to do when your done peeing, and still not doing it, because it slipped your mind.
Occasional paranoia.
Long term Amnesia of important dates and events.
Short term Amnesia, an inability to remember if you paid a certain bill or ate lunch.
Problems with coordination like walking into walls. Though it is assumed this is a result of the exhaustion.
Consumption of unusually large amounts of coffee or other caffeinated drinks.

Some patients may also suffer from more sever symptoms including:
Daily headaches making it hard to see straight.
Ulcers due to the amount of nsaids you take for your headaches.
An inability to get cartoon jingles out of your head.
Sever moodiness as a result not being able to watch your favorite TV show.

Other, considerably less affected patients may only exhibit mild symptoms.
Hairy legs
Bags under eyes
Long toenails
Considering an hour of uninterrupted blog reading time as a vacation.
Dirty hair

What does B.M.I. stand for? Why Busy Mommy Itis of course. B.M.I. is also commonly referred to as Mommy Brain. It is often mistaken for early onset Alzheimer. Extreme cases can mimic schizophrenia.

At this time, there is no known cure for B.M.I. The good news is that it is not a permanent ailment, as symptoms generally subside when your children leave for college or move out of the house. Unfortunately for some, by the time that happens, other ailments may have already started to develop. Such as dementia from old age.


  1. Excellent diagnosis! For my B.M.I. (yes I have it too) I feel that a stiff drink at the end of the day helps drown away the cartoon jingles but sadly doesn't help with the memory portion.

    I think I have reached the point in Summer where I'm looking forward to the beginning of a new school year. My kids are driving me nuts! I have also implemented a new rule in our house. If the sun is shining, the children must spend at least one hour outside playing quietly by themselves so I can clean up my house. Because with them in here, nothing gets done.

  2. I'm reading this saying to myself "OMG...I have BMI" Then I read that M stands for Mommy so I guess that is not it.

    This is probably a sign that if I do have children they will be forced to fend for themselves because I'll surely be helpless by then.

  3. I'm reading this saying to myself "Oh my God...I have this!" Then I read that M stands for Mommy so I guess it must be something else that I have.

    Perhaps this is a sign that if I have children they'll be on their own because I'll surely need to be hospitalized by then. Seriously though...I don't know how you do it.

  4. Ummm...yeah. I think I have this, but I can't remember.

    Actually, I almost passed out at my son's doctor appt yesterday because I forgot to eat. Seriously.

    Thanks for visiting me and commenting. I am known to stalk commenters. Sorry.

  5. Believe it or not I almost wrote a similar post, but my disease is called Hyper Discombobulatory Dementia. Again it is referred to as Mommy Brain and very little research is done because it affects women.

  6. I've suffered form BMI in varying intensities since 1976.

    Now that the final child is in adolescence, I feel that I am almost on the mend.

    Then I face senility and arthritis on the horizon.

    Oh joy.

  7. I'm so glad there's finally a diagnosis for what ails me! Great post! LOVED it!

    Visiting from Mama Kat's blog!

    ~ Jennifer

  8. At last, a disease I *don't* have. The CAIS is bad enough.

  9. Hilarious!

    I have BMI. Or LMI, lazy momitis. =)


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