Grrr Here We Go Again

This is the way my body works...

In the winter time, I weigh between 135 and 140, give or take. Mostly give, a-hem. Not that I have a problem with that. It is what it is. I eat larger, stick to the rib meals. Work is slow during that time of year, so I'm less active. And I bake a lot of damn cookies. My belt gets tightened to the 4th notch.

In the summer time, I weigh about 125. I eat lighter meals, salads and other cold selections. And I'm so busy at work, that I run in circles. When the weather warms up, I am constantly on the move. My belt goes to the 6th notch, usually around July.

I don't really like how I look at 125. Because I lost so much weight, so fast, a couple years ago, I have some loose skin in the belly area. The less I weigh, the more noticeable it is. It weirds me out. 

I'm a little worried this year. It's the middle of May and my belt is already at the 6th notch. Granted I had more work this winter, but not so much that I should lose weight as a result. In my head, if I'm already at the 6th notch, where will I be in three months?  The idea of being any smaller does not appeal to me. 

I need steak and potatoes. Someone get me a plate of pasta. If I had time I'd bake a chocolate cake and eat the whole thing.

I know most women would like to string me up at this point. More often than not, we battle with keeping weight off. But consider my job. I can't really be a waif of a girl when strength is required. I don't feel weak, quite the opposite. But I'm worried about three months from now, when I'm sweating my ass off, and still losing weight.

And if you're thinking I'll look great in a bathing suit this year, think again. Because as previously mentioned, Tummy.